A Guide to Planning Your Best Friend’s Bachelor Party
Most couples want to have one night of “freedom” before they march themselves down the aisle. If you’ve been tasked with helping to plan your best friend’s bachelor party, you might be a little worried.
Either you’re full of ideas for how to show him an incredible time, or you have no idea how to get started. You essentially have to plan an event, which a lot of people have , which a lot of people have never done before in their lives. Although a wedding is a much bigger thing to handle, the stag party can end up getting complicated too.
If you’re not sure what your first step should be, try following this guide.
Talk to Him
Your first thought might be to head to the nearest strip club. However, it’s important to remember that every groom is different. You need to plan an event that everyone attending will love, but remember that it’s mostly for the groom. You’re celebrating his impending nuptials, so you want him to have a good time.
Before you arrange anything, have a brief discussion about what he is and isn’t happy with. It might be traditional to hire a stripper or prank the groom. But it’s not fair to do anything he’s uncomfortable with and expect him to take it. Find out what he’s thinking before making any significant moves.
Decide Who’s Coming
Once you have a vague idea of what the groom is looking for, you have to work out who’s coming. Drawing up a guest list can sometimes get complicated. And it can remind you that petty drama certainly isn’t only for women. Consider who it’s appropriate to invite for the activities that you’re considering.
Did you know the groom wasn’t getting along with his brother-in-law? Well, you would’ve if you’d run the guest list by him in the first place.
Or, perhaps older family members can change the dynamic of the group. Some men choose to invite colleagues, even if they’re only “work friends”. But it’s best not to if numbers are too high. Just remember that you don’t have to invite anyone just because they’re expecting an invitation.
At the end of the day - it’s HIS friends and family that HE wants. You just make the invites.
And try to make it a good-sized, fun group. Four guys does not a bachelor party make. So after finding out who not to invite, try and get a good number together to make things interesting. That way things never get stale, because the last thing you want is a bored groom on your hands.
Choose What to Do
You’ve got a lot of options when it comes to making concrete plans for the party. There might be some traditional activities, but no one says you have to do them.
One option is to go somewhere like The Play Lounge, where you have a venue to yourselves and plenty of entertainment. But you can also do a lot of other things. They range from going away for a weekend to choosing an activity like skydiving. You could spend a day doing an assault course, go to a jazz club for the evening or just stay at home for a poker night.
Make Sure It Goes to Plan
As the best man, it’s also your job to help make sure everything goes off without a hitch. You don’t need to have a clipboard and a schedule. But you should check that things are progressing as they should. However, remember that you’re not their parent.
They all still need to look after themselves, and it’s their job to remember their passport or bring money with them.
Essential Dos and Don’ts
- If you’re planning a messy night, remember that the day before the wedding is best avoided. Choose a date well before the big day for ample time to recover.
- Make sure people RSVP and show up on time, because your job is to ensure that things go smoothly. Oh, and remember to bring the aspirin.
- Be careful about going overboard on spending - Sure, renting a penthouse suite sounds awesome, but your buddy with two kids is a little more frugal these days. So before you go booking anything too crazy, run the idea past the other guys to feel out their budgets.
- Make sure all of the groom’s expenses are covered. Ideally, all the guests should pitch in - but just in case, make sure YOU have it on hand, and cover it all. It’s his party so pony up the dough. Usually, like at dinner for example, just have everyone throw in a few extra bucks onto whatever they owe so as to cover the man of the hour.
- Do not, under any circumstances, hurt the groom. No pranks, no cliff diving, nothing out of the ordinary and dangerous. He doesn’t need to be on crutches on his weeding day. That said - do SOME activity. Shoot pool, throw darts. Take it easy but DO stuff.
- If a weekend, hotel or other overnight is part of the plan, make sure the groom gets a bed. Ideally everyone will have one, but sometimes budgets are tight and it’s four to a room, like your college days. So make sure the groom doesn’t get stuck sleeping on the floor, unless of course he passes out there. In that case, just let him be.
- Do what you can to keep the groom in-check. Be sure 12 guys aren’t all buying him 12 shots at the same time. And keep it classy - ahem - remember that the party isn’t an excuse for you, the groom, or any of the guys to cheat on your girlfriends, wives or significant others.
- No one should be pressuring anyone else to do things they don’t want to do, either. Just give the groom the party he deserves by showing him a blast before he heads off into marital bliss and everyone will go home happy campers.