Tips for Getting Her Number

It’s hard for any of us to swallow the big pill of rejection.

The fear of rejection will immobilize and shut down the best of the best. It’s so powerful that most men allow it to stand in the way of approaching a beautiful woman; because they’re too afraid of the possibility of being rejected.

If you’re serious about meeting new women - and lots of them - you must learn to take rejection in stride and not let it stop you in your tracks. For every woman that rejects you, you’re one woman closer to finding your perfect match. So when you get turned down simply move on to the next one. Sure - sounds easy. But in reality it’s hard….right? Wrong.

What you are sitting there thinking about is how it would be if you got rejected - without actually saying anything to her. And this thought of how it would be is way, way worse than it actually is. And how do I know? Because I live it. All the time. When I started out trying to meet new women, I was “rejected” 10 times more than I succeeded. And it was no big deal. In fact, it was how I got good. Really good.

The best way to get good at talking to women is to… talk to women. Think about it as you would, say, hitting a baseball. You can read about it. Think about it. Get coached on it. All kinds of things that have to do with hitting a baseball. But until you actually get in the batter’s box and start swinging - you won’t ever get good. And hell, the greatest baseball players among us only hit the ball less than 1/3 of the time they try!

Now…back to women….

What if you got rejected by 7 out of 10 women? Well - that means you were successful with 3. Anybody reading this want 3 new women in their life? No matter how cool or strong a man is, he will always sweat bullets when the time comes to approach a woman. For most men, there is nothing more intimidating than putting their ego in the line of female fire.

For the regular man, the most difficult phase of finding women is meeting them in the first place. This can be a little uncomfortable at times, but trust me when I say this is a necessary process. You can’t just sit around and wait for things to transpire;It ain’t gonna happen. I know this, too, from experience.

And let’s not kid ourselves; approaching a woman is one of the most stressful situations a man must face. I say “must” because that’s your roll - as the man - to approach. And I say stressful because it is - even the best among us at approaching still get those butterflies in our gut. But it doesn’t stop us - nor should it stop you.

Not all guys know what to say when they approach. They have no plan.

And not all men are born salesmen, and when the time comes to close the deal, they settle with a simple, “It was nice meeting you.” Why would you go through all that anxiety and work to begin the process and then not try to close the deal? Hell - you got this far! Get her phone number.

You should get into the habit of going for numbers every time you approach a woman even if you don’t plan on calling her. The more you do this, the more it’ll become second nature to you.

I have more phone number technique than you can imagine. And I share it all with you in my audio programs on meeting and dating women. Specifically, The Art of The Pick Up Line. And if you are at a loss for what to say to a woman, I lay out some great conversation starters in Complete Coversation Technique. But before you go for her number, let’s understand some fo the factors that will influence a woman to give you her number. You, my friend, have to create a nice comfortable connection with her. (fully explained in Complete Conversation Technique, and my audio program, Absolute Seduction). Even if a woman is single and ready to meet men, most are reluctant to give out their numbers for a variety of reasons.
The biggest reason? Safety. Or lack thereof.

The last thing a woman wants is to hand over an invitation for a stalker to start screwing her life up. So before she even considers sharing numbers with you, you’ll have to pass a couple of tests. (*sigh* - of course!)

Dig it:

If a man looks desperate, she’ll think there is definitely something wrong with him. She thinks - desperate men tend to become stalkers. Instead, show that you’re confident. She will take her cues on how to feel from you. If you are nervous and goofy, she’ll be nervous too. If you are scared, she will sense it and be scared too. Of you. So be cool. She’ll look to see, also, if you are giving too many compliments. Don’t open with one. She thinks - you’re trying too hard to get something out of her. You can bet that her guard will be a little more vigilant while you’re around. Keep compliments moderate.

And by all means - don’t open with, “Can I have your number”?

Again, this is explained fully in the audio programs I’ve mentioned, but the general idea here is that no one is going to simply give you their number because you asked for it out of the blue. Would you? No - you wouldn’t. She won’t either. So if you don’t have the guts to get her number, do you give her yours? Never just give out your number. Don’t hand out business cards and hope she’ll get in touch. She won’t. Get her phone number. You can give her yours in several ways after you get hers, but try to program your number into her phone. Why? Many women won’t answer calls from numbers they don’t know. Program yourself in her phone, ideally with “callback humor” – something that’ll remind her of meeting you and put her in a good mood.

Just for example - something from conversation. If she teased you, or called you a jerk or something, program your name as Joe the Jerk - or whatever your first name is. Cheesy, but it works.

The phone number should never seem like the goal of the conversation, just a natural part of your conversation.


Only get her number once you’ve discovered a shared interest for something – art galleries, sushi, live music, it doesn’t matter (this is that “connection” she’s looking for) Then you can casually say “hey, give me your number, I’ll let you know when I’m free and we can try that new sushi place”. Don’t end the conversation right after getting her number – stay at least a few minutes. If you are there with your buddies, make sure they’re cool – don’t let them look at her or congratulate you.
Men ask me all the time - what is the best way to ask for a phone number. And I tell them - I never ask. I simply tell her, “Give me your number”. Now, of course this in and of itself doesn’t do the trick. Properly placed in the conversation, it works all the time. There’s so many little things that go into a successful phone number score that just telling you what I say when I get her number isn’t the whole picture. But what I say, give me your number, is great because it’s a command. Believe it or not - women love to be told what to do. And if she’s thinking….”hmmm…should I give this guy my number?” you’ve just answered that internal question for her. Yes - she should.

Are you going to score every phone number and every woman you approach? Hell - no. But you are going to score some of them. And some is good. Some is more. And you are definitely not going score the ones you don’t go after. You’ll get zero of those. I’m sorry there’s no magic bullet out there - this stuff takes practice and a little work. And while there is no quick and easy solution to all your women problems - there is a way of life and audio programs to teach you how to handle and dominate the women in your life. And how to get more of them in your life to begin with. They’re all available at Modern Male LIfestyle.

Listen and learn - and go get some phone numbers. And more women in your life.

Til next time - live the lifestyle,


Get Phone Numbers - And More!

 the Art of the Pick Up Line

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Written by J.D. Dallas
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