Cut the Crap - Are Relationships Just Manipulation?

Recent email from a student:

Hey JD,
Just purchased some more email coaching.
And I just had a question that started from reading & learning about push-pulls.I’m pretty sure that I was hit by that one, or completely KO’d maybe! For 2 years!

Although I’m not sure whether she was doing it consciously / on purpose or it just came naturally.
I guess that’s not important. Whatever the real reason, regardless, I don’t understand why people play games. Guys or girls.
Wouldn’t we all want a relationship where were know neither of us played games or manipulated one another?
I ask because I just doubt I’m the first guy who has said that. I start to learn about all this and I’m more than confident I can pull all the bull shit games and manipulation off. But I’d much rather get someone without it.
But I honestly don’t believe it’s possible due to every girl I ever meet plays games with me (whether naturally or not).
Olly (Australia)


JD’s Answer

Hey Olly –

Great to hear from you, as always.

And no - you aren’t the first guy to say that. Or ponder it.

I know that it may seem like it’s a shame or it’s “too bad” that men have to “play games” to get the women they want.

But I don’t believe that any of it is bullshit - as you say.

Before I get into the meat of the situation - let me just say this:

There are RULES to courtship. And that isn’t a good or bad thing - it’s A THING. It just is.

I like to look at it as, if there are rules - then tell me the rules and I’ll play by them. It’s not good or bad - it just is.

There is so much “pick up artist” stuff on the web and in the world that it gives the male/female courtship ritual a bad name. In fact, most women I know simply judge any “pick up material” in a knee-jerk manner and say the guy is a scumbag or creepy or trying to trick them.

And yeah - there is some of that out there.

And that shit is for the losers - the guys who have no chance of getting a woman and don’t want to do the work necessary to make themselves attractive. So they resort to hypnosis, trickery, and all kind of under-handed bafoonery.

So how do I justify the things I teach men - especially when it comes to “picking up” women?

Well - first of all - where head games are concerned - Consider that it is all a game. It is all a dance.

We are just animals like all other living beasts on this planet. Every animal In the world has mating rituals.

It used to be - 1000s of years ago - that men were strong and protective and confident.

They were survivors. If they survived to adulthood, women instinctively knew the man was an alpha and was good to mate with.

That instinct has not changed over millennia - bit the way we “dance” has, as we have set up proper society.

You aren’t playing anything or anyone- if stuff like “push pull” seems like a game to you, it’s because it is not natural to you.

You see - a lot of what I know comes from experience and observation.

Have you ever heard the advice about becoming rich that says, watch what rich guys do - and then do that.

Pretty simple. Pretty effective sometimes.

If you take that advice on its face - then consider that if you just start out trying to do some things that rich successful guys do, you aren’t actually a rich guy. You are a regular guy doing some things that rich guys do. And it’s pretty likely that these new things you are doing aren’t natural for you - otherwise you’d already know how to do it! And the rich guys - chances are they are just naturals at being driven, saving and investing, inventing things - whatever.

Now - If you observe true alphas and men who seem to be successful with women, you will notice that it just seems natural to them.

It is not something they consciously think about - as in: I need to not respond to this text message right now so she will think i’m a busy guy and wonder what I’m doing.

No - they don’t THINK that. They just actuall ARE very busy AND probably doing something exciting or important. And they have multiple women who are after them. And they don’t NEED to respond to every text message from every woman.

Keep in mind - I’m just using this little text scenario to make a point. It’s not just with texting - but all aspects of the Alpha life.

These guys who are good with not blowing it with women, good at showing just the right amount of attention, all those things - they don’t realize they are doing it.

It is a by-product of living the Alpha life. Women ARE JUST ATTRACTED TO THEM.

A lot  of what I do is to study Alpha behavior - utilize that knowledge and test it in real life - and then break alpha behaviors down into teachable things guys can emulate.

That’s why it seems like a game.

Guys literally ask me 100s of times a day how to respond to a text - for example. And I tell them just don’t respond. And then they think they are playing a game.

It seems like a game because I’m taking non-alpha guys and giving them examples of what and how Alphas do and respond. In all areas of relationships.

What eventually happens, though, is that the guys who listen to my audio material and honestly start to implement it in their lives - these guys start to do what I call the ALPHA TRANSFORMATION.

They BECOME Alpha.

And they don’t have to worry about what to say next, what to do next, how to treat her, or anything. It just starts to come naturally.

And then - and this gets to the heart of your question/concern - they are in real relationships with real trust and real passion, because they are in their role as the Man, and their partners are in their role as the Woman - and everyone is fulfilled.

Stick with the program - and continue to grow until you make the transformation.

You will enjoy your life - and it will be fun.

And hey - games are supposed to be fun!

Until next time

Live the lifestyle



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