How to Win and Keep Control

I have to tell you a great story – just happened to me this weekend.

I was laying in bed watching a favorite show – about to call it a night. And my nephew sends me a text.

“Hey,” he says. “Are you up? Need Help. Girls.”

I’m always up for that.

My nephew – I’ll call him Jake - is 18 and starting college in the fall.

Since the day he started to notice that girls didn’t have cooties – he would always come to me for “girl advice”.

He’s had girls dump him, had girls he’s dumped, and for a kid – he was quick learner and started to do well – relative to high school, that is.

In fact, he started to become somewhat of a mini-me, as his friends would come to HIM for advice on girls, and he’d either tell them what he knew or he’d ask me.

This time – it was one of the latter. I told him to call me, and he did and started to explain about his friend Jason.

So Jake tells me in brief about Jason’s situation.

Apparently, Jason said something that his girlfriend took offense to, and she told him, “I think we need some time apart. I’ll see you in two weeks.” And she stormed off. It had been 2 days since then, and Jason was reeling – he thought he blew it and he really wanted to see his cute girlfriend. He wanted to know how to get her back right now.

That was all I needed to hear. This is an easy one.

Here’s what I told Jake to tell him, and how it played out.


First of all – this “2 weeks off thing” is a power play. Look at what is going on here – SHE is making the call, she is calling the shots. She says, you don’t get to see me for 2 weeks and that is what this Jason guy has to do.

In fact – Jason is really worried about it, and is afraid he will lose her.

And that is a really bad spot to be in.

Because, if he sits and takes this – in the future, now he is going to be very careful of what he says to her…because the last time he pissed her off, she closed up the candy shop for 2 whole weeks.

On top of that – She has learned that SHE controls the relationship.

A total power play, and he fell for it.

Any good Alpha man knows he must be in control of all his relationships and isn’t afraid to take control. Ever.


Granted – this is a very young man. A kid almost. He doesn’t have a lot of experience. He’s obviously not sure how to handle this. And I did NOT want this to become part of his experience.

Because as he goes on in life, and meets his next girlfriend, and the next, or even his wife – his experience is that when she says jump, he says how high.

This girl he’s with is going to break up with him if he lets her power play stand. And he’s going to think he wasn’t good enough for her. And he’ll start to settle for lesser women. And they, too, will take control.


So I told Jake – tell your buddy, He has one move, and one move only.

He says, “Ok – what is it?”

Look, I said, he is probably dying to call her, right? And she has this imposed no-contact rule, right? So if he calls, he’ll look weak, And he wants to beg her back.

“So he shouldn’t call her?” Jake asked.

Oh – hell yes he should. And here’s what he’s gonna say to her voicemail, because she isn’t gonna pick up on the second day. She likes the power and WANTS him to call and beg.

She’ll let him squirm.

Most guys would call. They would be crushed to get her voice-mail. And then they would leave a message they later regret that gives her EVEN MORE Power.

You tell him call her right now. And tell her that this is bullshit and he doesn’t agree with it. And that more than some time off is what he’s thinking. Let’s call this whole thing off.

She will see he is calling – and she will be thinking, “Ah ha! There he is already! Calling when we aren’t supposed to have contact. This is great…I’ll let it go to voice-mail and listen to his message and it will stroke my ego…etc.

And then she’ll check the message, all smug and please with herself. And then – the Power Bomb. This tells her: YOU do not make the rules. I am the man, and I make the rules. And when you try to make a power play on me – you LOSE ME.

Jake was like, “Dude – I will tell him. I totally trust you.”

I said, good. Make sure he does what I said.

He can’t lose if he does this.

If she really wants to break up, and she was trying to think of an excuse or wants to let him down easy,  then she’ll just say, well – ok. I agree, let’s break up.

And he is instantly better off for 2 reasons:

  1. HE will have done the breaking up – he didn’t get dumped.
  2. He just save himself another 2 months of groveling and dragging this thing out.

Any woman who doesn’t want to break up will immediately change her tune. Any woman that does really want to break up will let it go and it’s over.

But I don’t think he has anything to worry about. Now go tell him.

And with that, we hung up.

I go back to watching my show.

About 15 minutes later, Jake calls me back.

I say, “Well?”

“Dude,” he says. “You are a genius and a miracle worker. I told him to do it, and he wasn’t too sure about it, I explained it to him…and he did it.”

“Yeah, and?”

Like 2 minutes later she called him back and started apologizing! She said she really over-reacted and was wrong!”

“Yeah. And now – guess who is in charge?”

Man – I love those quick situations and “easy” questions. Things get really basic and work really quickly with younger, inexperienced women. They haven’t had enough time to figure out the whole game yet, how to play men, etc.

This Power Play/Power Grab will work for YOU your whole life. You can never, ever act like you are afraid she’ll leave, or put up with her threatening this or that.

As you – and the women in your life – get older, the “game” will be the same – it’s just that it will play out over longer periods of time. Women get proud, and stubborn as they get experience. She may pull her crap and stay away from you for 3 months – meanwhile, you’ve moved on to other women.

But she’ll be back.

I’m so glad we caught this situation with Jake’s friend when we did. If he let her continue to call the shots, she would’ve eventually dumped him – and it would be 100x harder if he wanted to “get her back” at that stage. It can be done – but don’t ever get into that situation to begin with.

Take control.

I teach you ALL about this in my audio training programs.

Like, The Alpha Life Volume 1.

And of course – in my top-selling program Total Control.

If you bundle these programs together with Get the Attitude - Get the Women you will become an unstoppable Alpha who CONTROLS not only his own life – but the lives of those he chooses to let into his life.

I’ve been doing this for a long time.

It works.

You can be on the Alpha track RIGHT AWAY with this intense training and technique.

All in the privacy of your headphones.

Shop Products on this website.

And then order these 3 programs:

  • The Alpha Life Volume 1
  • The Attraction Attitude
  • Total Control

Get INSTANT DOWNLOADS and save huge while you learn the most important lessons you ever will in your dating life. Possibly your whole life.

What you learn here, you will take with you forever.

Best- JD